As the title says, still in France. I wish we were home so much. I miss having my own room, own desk, my own space to breath and my own little, cute, darling rabbit. I miss her the most. I might have to give her up if we end up moving somewhere where it doesn't work to keep her. I hope not. She is only a rabbit, but she has been such a comfort. It is so good to have another living being you can tell all your troubles. Especially in the last year, with so much going on in my life, public school again and MOVING TO A COUNTRY WERE I DON'T WANT TO MOVE TO AND DON'T SPEAK THE LANGUAGE!!!
I am sitting here, writing on my blog staring at 5 huge spiderwebs. You might think,"How charming, you'd better go clean those up!" I would have thought that 2 weeks ago too. Except that 5 spiderwebs is not unusual in this old house. I have killed more than 15 spider in the days we've been here. 6 alone were in my room. It is really terrifying. Spiders have somehow taken on the role of embodying everything I'm afraid of. Moving, French, change, losing my rabbit, giving up a secure home. I am the kind of person that NEEDS home. I love going to America, but even there, I get homesick for my own bed and familiar surroundings after two months.
I get so mad at people sometimes. Mama just got a forwarded e-mail from our realtor the guy who wants to buy our house wrote it to him. That person makes me so mad, I feel like everybody is against us. I am so glad our realtor is such a nice guy. At least we have ONE person who is fighting for our interests not just his own. Anyway, the man that said he would buy our house signed a pre-sort of contract for a settled price, but now all of a sudden, out of knowwhere these problems appear. We share a big garage with our neighbor and all of a sudden this guy doesn't want that. Apparently its WRONG, and we have to fix it. And there are all these different little things that we are supposed to fix BEFORE he buys it. So, in the end he ends up paying far less for the whole thing because we loose a lot of money. And its not like money grows on trees, especially not for us! It makes me so mad, our realtor also found out that apparently we gossiped about none stop in our village, they even think we are mormens and we are not! It feels so awful when people spread rumors about you, rumors that aren't even close to the truth. I feel hurt and betrayed and at the momen I am seriously starting to believe Europeans in general are all mean, egotistic, greedy and stuck up people. Even though I am half european myself. Even here in France we are experiencing difficulties trying to find a house to rent. The french wont give us the time of day, just because our french is not very good and we are not from here. I'd like to see them come to the States, then lets see what they will think about foreigners!
The more I am writing the more I am getting mad, my fingers are flying over the keyboard right now. I am so mad, I am just so glad I have my pencils and paintbrushes. I don't know what I would do if God hadn't given me those.
I just wish the world weren't so unfair!!!!!
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